It has been 2 years since my husband has passed. I miss him so much. I miss feeling his arms wrapped aroung me, his hand reach out to hold mine. The love, the emotional support, the comfort and security.... those hugs, the holding of hands, were so much more than physical.
I find I am crying myself to sleep this holiday season...again. I smile when I look at photos of our past together, but as much as I smile at the loving memories, I find tears stream down my face- missing him, his laughter, his love, it hurts.
I do my best, trying to live in the present. I know it may not appear that way to those around me, but I am trying.
This trying my best....it is exhausting. Maybe next year, I tell myself.....maybe next year.
Next year, what?