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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I am alone tonight, New Year's Eve.  Just had a phone call from my younger son and a text from my daughter, so not forgotten by my family.  I guess I should expect this now with no-one special in my life. I wasn't invited to a party or to join any of the families, I did have Christmas with family so that was our special family time . I am okay with my own company now so I should not complain.

My review to follow up the melanoma operation is next Thursday so I am remembering that experience and feel just a little scared, nasty tests still to come. A family member is taking me down to Sydney so I will have support. I am a scarry cat sometimes. I have to have a few needles and that is part of the process, wish it wasn't. I know it is silly at my age to have these fears but I do.

Through this week I have had a few encounters with people I barely see through the rest of the year, we do a quick catch up and that is it till next year. One was a cousin of Ray's I am fond of,she is alone now do to divorce so understand s my loneliness and isolation. She doesn't live close by unfortunately! But it is always good to have a catch up. So many friends have moved away and that has reduced my friendship circle. One of the problems of the ageing process

Along the way I have also encountered some of my disabled friends from the Stroke Recovery group so I was reminded once again to count my blessings and pull myself up and go on as cheerfully as I can. No-one wants to be around someone who is constantly harking back to the past but my past was in many ways preferable to now. I guess we can all say that. I am not seeking sympathy just pointing out how it feels to be here tonight on my own.

So maybe in 2018 I will get a pet, something to greet me when I come home to an empty house, or sit here feeling sorry  and not my usual optimistic self. Honestly. I don't want to feel this way. I am watching the Show which precedes the fireworks on Sydney Harbour, there is some advantage to watching this in the comfort of my own home but.... how I wish I was not alone. No sense in dwelling on that thought though.

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Comment by only1sue on January 4, 2018 at 11:02pm

Thursday test not the one I expected. Results unsatisfactory so I have to go back and have another test on Monday.

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