A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
I just was walking across the lobby at the bank I work at and saw a customer at the teller line that lost his wife a few months ago. The girls weren't saying anything to him. They were doing what most people on the other side do that don't "get it", they were ignoring him.
So I stopped walking, turned around and said "Mr. Norton, do you need a hug today?" He is kind of hard of hearing so he said "What?" and I repeated, loudly, "Mr. Norton, do you need a hug today?" and he replied sadly "Yes, I sure do." So I hugged him. I hugged him long and hard and he hugged me back. And while I was hugging him, I looked over his shoulder and saw the girls giving those sad/pity smiles.
He said to me that nights are the hardest, when he goes to bed. I told him I knew and yes, they were. I also said "We will get there, one day, we will get there." and he said "I hope so." and he walked away and I walked back into my office without saying anything to the girls or looking over to them.
No more. No more will I ignore or walk by someone that I know has lost a spouse. Sometimes we just want a hug without asking for one. Sometimes we just need someone to come up to us and take that initiative. And the great thing about hugs is, the very great thing about hugs is, is that when you hug someone, you get a hug back. :-)