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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I lost my love of 31 years one month ago yesterday to AML Leukemia.  I thought yesterday was tough but today I received a call from hubby's best friends wife letting me know that Hospice said it would be just day for Cecil and that he was asking for me. I should have been to see them a lot sooner but I was only thinking about myself, lately. It was good to see them and to talk about my man David. They were friends for 32 years. He has been a joy in our live for many years. This is all so hard!David and I didn't talk about death it was not on our plan.  We spent the last 6 months away from our children and grandchildren at Mayo Clinic in Rochester Mn. having a stem cell transplant. We thought it was all was well and then infection set in. God was my saving grace during Davids Illness but I now realize that I have not called on him since I lost David. I guess I had better work on that. I just feel so empty with out the other half of me.

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Comment by Jackie (lvgma) on November 1, 2011 at 10:34am
The first monthys are so difficult- (((hugs))) to you.  Celebrate all the memories with good times.  I love eating desert first, sounds like something my danny would do.  Enjoy!!
Comment by CrazyWidow on November 1, 2011 at 7:26am
It's ok to only think of yourself, you've had a difficult journey.  *hugs*
Comment by jules on October 31, 2011 at 2:27pm
sorry to hear about your loss lil - find strength where you need to.  we're all here ready to listen, chat and heal together
Comment by lilwolf on October 31, 2011 at 4:51am

It is nice to know that I am not alone in what I feel and to have a place to share where I am at with my grief. We have two grown children and six beautiful grand children and tomorrow we will celebrate David's 59th Birthday. We will celebrate with dessert first that way you always have room to eat it.


Comment by Dianne in Nevada on October 31, 2011 at 4:47am
I'm so sorry, lilwolf. The first months are so difficult - all of the emotions, the loneliness, the reliving of those last days, weeks, months - but just take each day one moment at a time. It does get better. Visiting your friends was a wonderfully kind thing for you to do so soon after losing your David, and I'm pleased to hear that it was a good thing for you.  I, too, leaned on my faith during my husband's cancer battle and yet found myself feeling so very alone after his death. We had 41 years together. But it makes a big difference when we're able to call on Him to help us through these days.  And it also helps to come here to share with others who know how you're feeling.  Hugs and prayers to you.
Comment by Joyce on October 31, 2011 at 4:32am

lilwolf - hugs to you.  I know how you feel, I feel so empty myself!!

Comment by Lisa (lost) Lamb on October 31, 2011 at 3:16am
I'm sorry lilwolf for your pain and loss. So much of the time I feel better after talking about my husband, and that's why this place is so great.We all "Get it"  and will always be here to listen. Prayers for brighter days ahead for us all.

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