A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
From Camp Widow and Beyond
Hello and greetings from CrazyWidow & CampWidow CWx2.
I realized, on my second year here at Camp Widow, that you can take time for yourself while you are here. Last year, I was overwhelmed - having broken my back 2 weeks prior to arrival, the trip was long and painful, and I was heavily medicated. I was presenting a blog workshop with the awesome Supa Dupa Fresh but just did not feel I had my wits about me. Combination of injury, drugs, and just plain widowhood.
I was overwhelmed. I went to every workshop I could, barely resting in between despite my body's need. I pushed and pushed and pushed (what's new, right?) and ya know what? It wasn't worth it.
Camp Widow was worth it.
The pain was worth enduring.
But it wasn't worth it to push myself to an unhappy, unsatisfied level.
So this afternoon, if you are just filled, you are aching, you are tired, you just need some solitude; it's ok. Take the time. Self care is the most absolutely important thing in your life right now.
That's what I'm doing. Yesterday I volunteered and led a roundtable. At about 9:30 last night I finally shut off, went out on the beach by myself and talked to my Kevin, in the only way I truly feel I can talk to him - while at the beach. It's where we spent most of our great memories - fishing off the shores of Assateague in Maryland.
Then I had animal crackers in bed, without beer like the night before ;) I checked the weather forecast - it was going to be thunderstorming, so I figured I'd go to workshops. But this morning, the forecast had drastically changed. It was going to be nearly 80 and sunny. I knew where my heart and body had to be.
After the keynote, I changed clothes and off I went to the beach where I wrote and tried to solve all my life problems in my head. Alone. Because that's what I needed.
Now I'm back volunteering for Widville, but after this, I think it's more beach. Because that's the self care that I need right now.
So stop guilting yourself, and do what you need to do. It's ok. No one's saying where and what you need to be doing while you're here. Love on yourself, let go, and enjoy whatever presents itself to you. Ok, maybe not EVERYTHING, but enjoy what you truly need from this.
Cheers and see y'all tonight!
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Comment
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Comment by CrazyWidow on April 26, 2012 at 10:09pm -
I get overwhelmed too - it's so frustrating!! I keep moving, but some day, I just want to stop and do nothing.
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Comment by Kerryn on April 23, 2012 at 3:09pm -
I'm glad you took time for you! It's something many of us need to do and don't - I know I don't near enough. The one thing I did for me was getting a trainer and going to a couple work-out classes/week - right now I'm trying to tough through my siatic nerve bugging - afraid if I stop going to class to heal, I'll be pulled back under and won't go/get back. There are so many days I just want to crawl under the covers and not come out. I used to have energy and multi-task w/ the best of them. Now, I get overwhelmed just looking at the kitchen that needs cleaning or of making supper - but regardless what I want, I have to keep on moving - I have two boys depending on me - family try to help out, but there really is only so much they can do in the day to day living w/ two boys - I'll get my time in 6 yrs - hopefully.
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