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We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

From the day B  passed away, I knew I was goinig to get a tattoo for him. 

When we first started talking, I asked him how he felt about dating a girl that had no body piercings or tattoos, he simply replied "I want to take that virginity " Today he did just that. 

Over the past few weeks a lot of design ideas crossed my mind. I wanted to get the word "Promise" in his hand writing on my pinky. After "searching" I could not find the word, in the hand writing i came to know and love. So, I gave up on that idea. 

Fast forward about a week. I needed to switch out my purse and found a note from Blaine that I had forgotten about. Was one of the times that he wrote "I love you" . I immediately thought, this is it. This is what I need. I milled it over and thought. Yup.. this is it. 

The night before I was supposed to get it, we got something in the mail that rocked me to the core. I considered not getting it at all. Thinking that maybe my love had a life that I was unaware of. Thinking of him in such a way HURT. He was the light of my life. He made any dark dreary day worth living. 

After his passing I have thought often about following him, because I wish to be with him. I am also a recovering self mutilator. I thought that if I got this tattoo, in this place, any time I was triggered to do something stupid, Id see his love for me and I would think twice. I need to live, for him. 

While in the parlor, talking to the artist about life, a song came on. No we were listening to white guy stoner rap, when Itty bitty pretty one by Frankie Lymon came on. No one could have guessed that song was a song B said made him think of me. No one would have known that.. It was absolutely incredible.. Felt like B was telling me he loved me. It was hard not to cry a little. 

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Comment by mixelated on June 8, 2015 at 9:47am

Thinking of doing the same, Lost15. When you consider that cremation is at 1800 degrees, it has to be pretty sterile. The ash has no organic material left in it at all. It's basically calcium and other minerals. 

Comment by Jeane on June 2, 2015 at 5:10pm
I wonder about infection also. I have just gotten my second tattoo. Now I have second for family. Spring bouquet,forget me nots for Erv, sunflower for me, shasta daisy for our wedding and stargazer and calla lily because and four lady bugs for four kids. We seemed to always have lady bugs in rv and said they are for luck. Then on ribbon I have wedding date and his death date. I might add a butterfly for my bff who will more than likely pass before tomorrow.
Comment by H2obapper on June 2, 2015 at 7:07am

Lost15, I think the memorial tattoo is a great idea (I am in LOVE with my little cross for my husband), but I don't know about the ashes.  While I don't think it is morbid, I worry about infection.  When I ponder these type of questions, i always ask myself what would my husband say; that is usually the right way for me to go.  Good luck with your tattoo; I know it will hold meaning forever!

Comment by Lost15 on June 2, 2015 at 4:42am
Opinion everyone....I'm thinking of getting a Tatoo with some of my husbands ashes mixed that morbid?
Comment by H2obapper on May 21, 2015 at 12:33pm

I"m getting my memorial tattoo on May 29th, our 5 year wedding anniversary.  Its just a simple white cross on my left ring toe, but its to honor my Ray. 

Comment by sunshines007 (Sharon) on February 10, 2015 at 6:25pm

I also got a memorial tattoo  angels wings with a cowboy hat

Comment by TogetherForever on February 4, 2015 at 12:17pm
This is beautiful. I got a memorial tattoo also I have been a widow for 5 months and got mine about 6 weeks ago. It was a huge step for me but I love it!
Comment by Jeane on January 29, 2015 at 6:13pm

I love your tattoo.  We were not tattoo people but Ervin was a police officer and I always said if he got killed in the line of duty I would get his badge tattooed on me.  Well I had one put on my arm 4 weeks ago which is the gray ribbon for brain tumor awareness with the screaming eagle for the 101st along with a copy of his Viet Nam ribbon.  Then on the ribbons end it has GPD for Galveston Police Dept then his badge number.  At the top is 5er for our fifth wheel and his name.  I have had a lot of compliments on it but then there are some that say Why?  It is because I want it and it reminds me all the time of him.  

Comment by BESTBUDS1 [Norman} on January 25, 2015 at 1:57pm

awesome tiff......

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