My name is Alicia. I'm new to the site and this is my 1st post. I'm a 31yr old, now single mother of a 4yr old. My best friend and love of my life passed away Aug 28th, 2015 unexpectedly from a genetic heart condition that we never knew he had. We had been together for 7yrs. I'm so happy to find this support group!! I'm very close with my family but they live pretty far away from me. And while I love my family they just don't understand my loss. Especially at such a young age. I've been looking for support groups for young widows but there are little to none. Maybe that's because as younger people the concept of people dying at our age just seems like such a far fetched concept. It certainly never occurred to me until it happened. The thing I'm struggling with now is that before Jamail passed away he and I were not on the best terms in our relationship. So the last year of our relationship had been rocky. We were still madly in love with each but we were letting the stress of life and finances cause us to fight over what I now realize were such petty things. I said things I regret. And now he's gone. We always thought we had time. We always thought that we'd have the next day to kiss and make up. But tomorrow never came. Now I'm filled with so much regret for wasting what I now know we're the last mths, days, hrs of our time together arguing over things that ultimately didn't matter. I feel so guilty. Guilt for not making sure he knew much I was still head over heels in love with him. Guilt for not knowing how sick he was. Guilt for not forcing him to go to a doctor sooner. I don't know how to move forward. I feel like I'm in shoulda, coulda, woulda hell!! Has anyone else felt this way?