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I can get through several hours at a time feeling normal but then the reality that Brad is dead will settle in and I feel exhausted and suddenly not able to think straight...

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Comment by AEDforever (Ali) on March 2, 2013 at 2:03pm

I remember my BIL asking me about 2 weeks after Paul died "how are you doing/feeling?"...I replied "ever been drug behind a horse?"...that is how I felt..absolutely beat up.

Comment by AEDforever (Ali) on March 2, 2013 at 2:01pm

Beinthemoment...Yes, yes, yes! It is totally normal and very, very common.  Sometimes we kick into "autopilot" mode to get things done, work, whatever is necessary. And then maybe nothing is distracting you, and you realize what has happened. It is overwhelming and exhausting and truly painful.  Be nice to yourself at these times, tell yourself "i'm greiving", and treat yourself extra nice..whatever that means for you.  hot baths, massage, a special treat..whatever it is that can give you a very small bit of comfort.  ((Hugs))

Comment by kshy on March 1, 2013 at 5:23pm
A friend told me once that grief is exhausting...that is my experience, too. Especially in the first months. There is so much going on underneath the surface, and the emotions are like a moving target. My mind was completely overwhelmed, too. Take care, allow yourself down-time, breathe, sleep, try to be patient and gentle with your tender heart. Healing takes a lot of energy.
Comment by JK (OK) on March 1, 2013 at 4:38pm

I am also newly widowed, I feel the same way alot of the time. Its been 2 months since I lost my wife, and it comes and goes, some days are better than others. I think it will be like this until the "acceptance" stage of grief. I am still not there.

Comment by Beinthemoment on February 28, 2013 at 1:55pm
Thank you so much :)
Comment by dlm94 on February 28, 2013 at 1:20pm

Yes!!! I am 3 months in. My daughter (16) has suffered headaches for the first time in her life, since her daddy died. For myself, I love the challenge of a to do list and a  million errands in one day, but it is MUCH harder now. Everything is harder. I get through work fine, but am 5x as tired after. I think grief is like having leg & arm weights on all day. We both find that we are more sensitive to sound and light right now, too. Keep it as simple as you can and take care of you. 

Comment by john on February 28, 2013 at 1:05pm

Yes im experiencing this ive only been bereaved 9 weeks i was told this is normal to feel physically exhausted 

Yes its very normal to feelthis way

Comment by smit09 on February 28, 2013 at 9:24am

super normal.

I'm at 18 months, in a new relationship (with a widower) and feel that way at times.

-he does too

the key is to be open with yourself about how you're feeling every step of the way.

I am getting the picture that being widowed is going to be hard work every day... but being positive is extremely helpful. hugs

Comment by Joyce on February 28, 2013 at 8:50am

Beinthemoment:  Yes it's so normal, I'm at 16 months and I still feel like that most days.  Hugs

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