I'm feeling cranky, lonely, tired.
Then I realized it's April.
That date is looming right around the corner.
Yes, that date. The one that turned my whole world upside down.
How could it have been 7 years already?
It still feels like yesterday.
If I didn't know who I was after I lost you, I really don't know who I am now.
The word widow isn't so foreign to my lips. But it's still uncomfortable.
I still say "our house" and talk about him like he's still living.
And he is still alive.
In my heart, in my head. Everywhere I go he's still with me.
I miss you more than you would ever have imagined.
In spite of my ongoing sorrow I have friends who pull me through the darkness back into the light.
I'm very grateful for them.
They let me talk about him and keep him alive.