Now, all we have are our memories.
That's really too bad, especially after all that we shared, and all that we had.
But we have the memories.
And sometimes the memories seem faded and distant and old.
especially considering that one day...one day I WILL BE old, and he'll always be this young, handsome dude.
but the memories...
we hold on tight to those memories.
************MY CHIT (CRAIG) MEMORY***********
-how the memory came about-why it came to mind: Tonight I was doing laundry... and when Craig was alive, he'd always toss his clothes off in random areas in the house, and I'd eventually pick them up and toss them in the hamper. When it came to laundry, I never searched the pockets, because that's just an added step that I simply 'don't' have the time for! well Chitty, my sweetie, he'd NEVER empty out his pockets, and I'd end up washing all sorts of things. -beer caps, kleenix, pens, lighters, lip chap...
Tonight, I was washing my old winter coat. I noticed myself search its pockets. I think I must have eventually picked up that habit, because I find myself doing that now...or maybe I just simply found the time...
anyhow... I came across a stick of vanilla lip chap ...
heres the memory---
(I'm at work at a small diner in town, and Craig's on his lunch break from his job at the Ethanol Plant in town....he often visits me for his break, even WHEN I pack his lunch...he'd always say "I just love being around you.")
Craig walks in the front door (which makes me rethink this memory, and wonder if it was his day off...because when he's on his lunch break, he would always come through the back door...and of course, with him being dead and all... I cannot hash it over with him)
OKAY. yes... it WAS indeed his day off, because he wasn't wearing his helmet!! (sorry folks)
back to the memory....
Craig walks in the front door of the diner, he smiles at me, I immediately smile back at him-ear to ear-and gesture my body in his direction. He's walking closer in my direction and we meet in the middle at the sandwich bar. We touch hands over the counter, and are smiling at one another face-to-face, we begin to talk about something---but this part of the memory is unclear--- I remember it wasn't a long conversation, and he didn't even stay for lunch... I think he may have come in to get the keys or something... but as he was leaving, I was heading back toward my waitress station at the back of the room, and I called out for him to come back... and he did.
We kissed behind the little half wall and I asked him if he wouldn't mind picking me up some lip chap.
He said 'anything for you Smitty' ---or something to that effect.
He would do anything for me. (and I-him)
It wasn't long, poss 5 minutes and he was back with 2 sticks of vanilla lip chap.
he said "its all they had, I got you two" with a big grin awaiting approval.
I put some on and we kissed again.
I love when memories suddenly come to mind.
Can you guys comment with a random memory of your spouse???
I hate when memories become foggy and faded sometimes... you can't even confirm if something did or did not happen because the other half of that memory is gone!!! Anyone experience what I am talking about? I figure a good way to keep the memories alive are by talking about them, writing about them and continue to share, share, share!
Peace and Healing,