Missing Steve so very much right now. What is it about the change of seasons, the holidays that make this feeling so much more intense? I miss him all the time, but more so here lately. I'm busier than ever, therefore no time to sit and reflect on the fact that he is STILL not here.
I haven't been here lately, I check in often, reading about different Widville residents, their losses ,triumphs some small milestones, others HUGE milestones. Sometimes when I come here to Widowed Village, I don't want to return. Not because I don't care, or I have moved forward to the point of NOT needing to be here, can't imagine that ever happening. But I get so sad and hurt down into my belly for everyone just beginning this journey because I remember the unbelievable pain, the head spinning confusion on what to do next and the desperate feeling of being left (although, I get not by his choice) I then remember why I landed here in the first place , the wonderful people who reached back and down to lift me up, the terrific friends I have made, everything I have learned. Michelle, who spoke at Camp Widow East (the first year) about climbing out of the canyon floor, reach back and down, extend your hand to the next widowed person who just hit the ground. Her message keeps playing over and over in my head.
Thankful that this site is available for all whether just starting out or continuing forward. It is the journey that never ends.
Have the best Thanksgiving you are able, given your place on the path.