A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
So, as I've posted before, I have been widowed for a loooong time. Oct. 16 will be 11 years. I like to think a few years back I finally got my head wrapped around what the loss of Bradley specifically and loss ingeneral mean to me. I definitely came out of my grief with a different perspective on love and loss. But this week I learned that the man I was involved with for a few years during 2006-2009 died.
I had not spoken to him since Jan. of '09 and our relationship ended in a spectacular failure. Short version--I was breaking up with him and he had an almost fatal overdose. It was ugly and I broke it off as cleanly as I could at the time.
I mean I never wanted to get back together with him, but somehow knowing that the last person I was in love with (had sex with for that matter) is dead.
I'm also a little surprised an a little pissed off that hearing of his death has triggered my grief of losing Bradley. I'm pissed because I honestly thought I was past all that. I know better, but nonetheless.
So, I just feel like that wound is open again. It's not gaping but it's sore. It won't take long to heal, but for now it sucks. Balls.