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We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Patton Oswalt: Why does it take a celebrity to talk about widowhood?

Mainly, this: I am grateful that wonderful online magazine Ravishly asked me to do an article on the media reaction to Patton Oswalt's engagement just 15 months after his wife died. It's the first time a magazine has commissioned me to write for them. Same day deadline. Here it is:

I'm not big on celebrities, and what I don't understand: Why does it take a Patton Oswalt or a Sheryl Sandberg to bring what losing a spouse feels like into the media forefront? When they do, it's hailed as a revelation but us widowed folk are everywhere and some of us are even reasonably articulate. This stuff shouldn't be a surprise.

Secondly, you probably know by now I blog: It's been pretty dead because I'm writing a book and, you know, I already fried my brain in the eighties. But I'm feeling dark and I try to keep the blog upbeat. No one wants to hear, hey, life just was f'ing better before so let's lament that with tequila. And I'm usually upbeat. I've discovered a couple walking groups and I've made a couple friends through them and I'm grateful I can do a six mile walk through hills if pressed into it.

So, do any of you even want a place to be dark? Like, organizing a social life when you're no longer married can just be a lot of work. Also, do any of us feel our current boyfriends/girlfriends aren't right for us, but dating and it's sttendant indignities are just too enervating?

Thanks for listening on a dark evening,

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Comment by SweetMelissa2007 on September 2, 2017 at 6:35pm

A good many people view celebrities some how as super humans - the thought is that nothing effects them like it does common folk ...

I can understand the outrage by some widow/ers - it leads others to push to date/re-marry as a cure for grief &/or the only path to happiness ...

Being compared to other widow/ers - been there, done that, hated it ...

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