Today I had doctors appointment in Tinley Park --I was so proud, I found the place and was on time and everything went really well. When I get in my car to go home, I burst into tears and for the next 35 miles cried like he died this morning. I have no idea why sometimes it cuts so deep and hurts so badly. I need to get back my relationship with God - I just need a little more time on that. It is hard not to think about the past, the present or the future. What does one think about then? It is hard to keep busy not to cry all the time yet cry to heal. It is difficult to let go and hang on at the same time. It is miserable to accept forever something you cannot stand for a minute. Maybe tomorrow will be better.