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When Edd asked me to marry him back in 2007, on New Year's Day, it was one of the best days of my life.  Not only because of how happy his proposal made me, but because the ring he chose was so incredibly beautiful.   It gave me great joy to wear it.

After losing him I found comfort in wearing my rings .... but after a while looking down at them brought pain.  Everyone is different.  I have another widow friend who still wears her wedding rings and does so with great happiness.  I couldn't bear to wear them, but I couldn't bear to have them stay tucked away in my jewelry box either.  It made me sad to see them there.   I've wondered what to do and found a perfect solution for me this weekend.


The jewelry store where we purchased the rings was having a reuse/renew/restyle event that I went to.  I was able to pick out a new setting and I did!  It's completely different than the original and now my beautiful diamond sits in a white and rose gold setting that accents this Masterpiece perfectly!

I am also going to get the original setting and my wedding band disconnected and have the band saved in its original state.  Then I'll get another gemstone (Edd's birthstone perhaps?) put into the original engagement ring setting .... 

I love it.  It's bringing joy again ... and I know Edd would be pleased....  

... pleased that I can move forward... and still honor our love and special memories!


The original

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Comment by katjames on September 7, 2013 at 6:44am

GussieW-W ...... What a wonderful way to handle the ring issue!

Comment by AEDforever (Ali) on September 3, 2013 at 4:36am

Its beautiful!

Comment by katjames on September 3, 2013 at 4:28am

It's all so personal isn't it Phyllis and it's about what feels right to you and what gives you comfort.  I love the  ring I created.  It's the same stone, but a different setting.  I feel as though I am now the same, but different.  I feel like the ring symbolizes that I am moving forward but keeping the most valuable and precious parts of my marriage still with me..... It symbolizes moving forward (NOT moving on) and still honoring my husband and our memories..... When I look at the ring I wear now I'm reminded that I can't go back, but I can carry all the wonderful times with me.... and my husband in my heart always.

Comment by Phyllis on September 3, 2013 at 4:20am

Kat, thank you for putting some ideas in my head.  My husband died one year, three weeks ago, and I have been wearing my rings off and on.  I was not in the habit of wearing the ring I got married with every day even when Don was alive.  I always took my rings off at night and some times wore one of my mother's wedding bands instead.  It was not an issue for either one of us.  Don didn't wear his ring at all; he was not comfortable with any ring.  When he died, he had it on his finger and when I got it back, I took it to a jeweler and had our birthstones put on it and sized for me.  It looks strange, but it's beautiful to me.  I have my mothers wedding rings that I am going to give to my sister .  She asked me if I was sure I didn't want them and I told her I didn't think it appropriate for me to wear or keep.  Now I think I will investigate having the wedding rings I got married with and the band Don gave me turned into a ring that I can wear on my right hand.  Like sonja7, my wedding and engagement rings don't fit me anymore and it's a shame for them to just sit in my jewelry box.

Comment by sonja7 on September 2, 2013 at 11:25am

What a wonderful way to deal with this issue.  My problem has been that the original rings stopped fitting (yes, not only did I gain weight, but arthritis in the hands has swollen my joints, so now I can honestly say the original rings wouldn't fit even if I were to weigh what I did when we married). Your solution has certainly given me food for thought.  Thank you, Kat.

Comment by Dianne in Nevada on September 1, 2013 at 9:24am

It's beautiful, Kat. And I'm so pleased that it is bringing you joy ♥ 

Comment by Suz on September 1, 2013 at 1:45am

It is so beautiful, Kat. You must feel so good, knowing that you can wear it with joy and not feel emotional pain every time you see it. It is such an individual decision and everyone has the right to make that decision of what is right for them. You have done a beautiful job of working it through.

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