I went back to work pretty quickly after Michael died...took off about 2.5 weeks. I needed the normalcy somewhere and I needed to show my kids that life will indeed continue on. This week, I went in on Monday and realized that I needed time off to just be. I visited Michael's burial site, a beautiful,natural wooded area across from the Monastery. It was so peaceful and beautiful yet so very sad. I have run errands, sat and stared into space, shopped, cried and read. I am so tired of grief and of being in a state of fog! I want life,lived fully. I just feel so drained and hollow. Nothing takes away the emptiness and hollowness no matter what I do. I hope this state of being does not last...My children deserve true joy and I can only fake it right now. August seems like it was just yesterday yet also feels like an eternity has passed since I touched and talked with my husband. God bless everyone who is going through this thing called grief. It is a journey like no other.