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Thank you for your comments and support it really does help,had a tough couple days .water pipes froze last nite was 23 here in fla.threw myself on the kitchen floor crying for 2 hours but it wasn't really the froze pipes that was the catapult that set me off.I looked outside and saw his boat and truck realizing I would never stand there and watch him hook to his boat again.we commercial fished together for 32 years that was some of the most peaceful times we had together on the water.I can't do that by myself now and I'm not willing to work with anyone else.he had told me to sell our commercial license and equipment but not yet I can't.I gave in and let my sister treat me to a manicure yesterday that was nice.After dinner the kids and I sit around the table do homework,talk and that's good too so it's not all terrible.I've gotten this far so I think we'll be ok.It just hurts so much.nite

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Comment by Di on January 9, 2015 at 12:16pm

You are so right that it wasn't the frozen pipes that caused your meltdown. You are so very new in your grief journey that I think you will find that your emotions will be raw and intense for quite some time. My husband died over a year and a half ago and it is just recently that I have begun to get my bearings and begin to build a new life for myself. I actually moved to Florida 6 months ago to be near my daughter and grandkids. That change and being able to have the little ones in my day to day life has made a world of difference. It sounds like your Grands are helping in your healing also. I'm glad that you are able to find some joy with them and to allow yourself a bit of pampering. Hang in there and try to take care of yourself as much as possible.

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