I just read your story and I have to say I sympathize with wondering how you are going to spend the rest of your life without him. My story is similar, except that my significant other and I didn't live together and we were together for 18 years kind of off and on. What I have been doing is trying hard to involve myself in a new project or endeavor---something that I never even thought of doing when he was alive. I still have problems sometimes with missing him. MY boyfriend had died 9/3/2014 and it still is hard. I still feel like I need him and could he PLEASE come back---I ask that to the stars every once in a while. If you need to vent, feel free to come to my page to talk if you need to talk. :)
Welcome to Widville, jhens2017. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.
Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here! You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.