This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

  • Female
  • Vernon Rockville, CT
  • United States
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Susan's Page

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Susan's Blog

What do I want?

Posted on January 13, 2014 at 3:27pm 1 Comment

I am downsizing. I no longer need, nor want my big house, with rooms for entertaining and company. I don't need a big woodworking workshop in the basement, nor a music room for my husband's drums, keyboard, and guitar. I don't need televisions in every room. I don't need a gourmet kitchen that I use only to make coffee and microwave supper. All of that became unnecessary the minute Kevin died and I changed from a wife to a widow.

Now I crave a simpler life, with fewer… Continue

How long until the pain subsides?

Posted on January 3, 2014 at 6:18pm 2 Comments

I know that everyone is individually experiencing this journey. I know there is no time table, no rights or wrongs. But it seems to me that a great many people are able to FUNCTION better than I can. It has been fourteen months since my husband died. I still feel pain with every thought of him and of the life I lost as well. I want desperately to feel happy again. I want to be able to relish the "now" and live every moment. I read all the time that life is a gift and I should gratefully savor… Continue


Posted on December 14, 2013 at 4:44pm 4 Comments

I've been on this journey for thirteen months now. I know it is a journey, and I know the destination is uncertain. I try to be patient with myself, I try to have faith, I try, I really do. And, for a while, I was doing okay. I read my earlier blog entries and it seems that I was doing so much better earlier in this journey. I made some new friends, I enrolled in art and in yoga classes, and I made plans so that I would not be alone so much. I think I had hope. Now, though, I am stuck in a very… Continue


Posted on October 21, 2013 at 5:22pm 3 Comments

I have just finished a five-week "intensive outpatient program"-- the only option I had other than an inpatient psychiatric hospitalization. I have learned a tremendous amount about myself and my grief over the past five weeks. I know now that during the first five or six months after Kevin's death, when I thought I was working through the grieving process, I was really in shock, numb, and just surviving. There was so much to do--legally, financially, pragmatically. I got stuff done. But I… Continue

Comment Wall (4 comments)

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At 9:39pm on December 14, 2013, Joanne said…

Hi Susan thank you for the friend invite:)  I just started to read your message and then clicked on something and lost it.. I just joined today and am still trying to figure out how the site works.  Is there some way to retrieve the messages? I have tried several things but no success lol..

At 11:07am on March 29, 2013, LJ1 said…

Susan, sorry for taking so long getting back to you - Just a crazy time at school - finishing CMTs, fund raising, PTO meeting, admin meetings, you know the deal. Anyway, I'd love to get together and talk work/widowhood/grief, whatever! Today is my 2 year sadiversary. My husband went to the grocery store and never returned - Laurie

At 9:02am on January 24, 2013, Prairie Gal said…

Hi Susan, I am so sorry for you loss. Yes, it is vey tough, isn't it? Hopefully it will get better with time. Thanks for the friend request.

At 7:00pm on January 13, 2013, wannabmartha said…

So sorry for the reason that you’re here but glad you’ve joined us. You’ll find insight, understanding and support here at Widowed Village. We’re traveling the same road together some further down the road than others.  Join a group when you’re ready to get better connected. Participate in a forum and/or chat anytime. If you have questions, feel free to ask. There is always someone around willing to help.


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