This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

  • Female
  • Savannah, GA
  • United States
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Littleblue's Friends

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littleblue replied to Snagglefoot's discussion Guilt, Shame and Pain in the group Suddenly Widowed
"Please don't feel bad.  I know it is so hard.  My husband had liver disease and I did not cook the healthiest food for him either, and I really felt so guilty about that after he died.  Like, I didn't care enough or was too…"
Aug 12

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My husband of 3 years passed away suddenly on September 20, 2012. The physician told us he had one to two years to live without a liver transplant, less than a week later he was in a coma and less than a week after that, he died. I am 38, he was 50. We have no children, only two Siamese cats which we adore(d). Very grateful to have found this community as a young widow.

I lost my beloved husband of 3 years on September 20, 2012.  We were together for 5 years, married for 3.  I am 38, he was 50, we had no children, but we had 2 Siamese cats that we adored.  Two weeks before he died, the doctor told us he had 1 to 2 years to live without a liver transplant, which was scary enough, but less than a week later he was in the hospital in a coma, and less than a week after that, he died.  So it was very sudden.  I am so grateful for his parents who are close by and share my grief, and plenty of friends but right now I am most interested in talking to women who have been there.  Glad I found you all.  

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At 7:59pm on October 5, 2013, WhereNow? said…

If you look at my profile page, you'll see so many similarities between us - I'm so grateful.  What an awful experience you have had - I'm beyond sorry for your loss and the circumstances.   Take VERY good care of yourself -


At 6:54pm on October 14, 2012, LaurieR said…

Hi littleblue.  I am so sorry for your loss.  Your pictures tell the story of a very happy couple.  I am so glad you found this sight, the people here have helped me a lot.  I am sure you will find help here, also.  It is so very hard for people who have not lost their significant other to understand what your going through.  People here all have lost their love and understand.  If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.  I will do my best to help you.  I will send you a friend request, if you wish you can accept

At 4:07pm on October 14, 2012, kshy said…

We definitely share some similarities! I haven't been to clientsfromhell in a while. Thank you for the reminder! I, too enjoy my job, it gives me something to focus on. I was worried my creativity would be totally stunted, but it hasn't been, so I think it's serving as at least one outlet. One of the challenges is that your whole life-perspective shifts after such a loss, and sometimes it really is hard not to "lose it" with people and their pettiness. I have cut back to a 4-day work week, because I always feel myself moving toward a "melt-down" by thurs. There is simply nothing like going through the experience of saying goodbye to your spouse, and the emotional mayhem that follows. But I am glad for this forum. And I am glad you have family support. Scott looked like a sweet and kind person, you can just see it in the pictures. My heart goes out to you and his family. I look forward to staying in touch as we "muddle" through these incredible challenges.   - Katja.

At 11:46am on October 14, 2012, kshy said…

Yes, this is place where you can share such a photo. It vividly brings back the memories of my husband's last night, I didn't know if he had awareness of my presence, but it doesn't matter. I was there for him, and witness to his last breath...the most bitter-sweet moment of our lives together. We, too were together for several years, then married for 4. It took me a long time to find the right man to marry (damn it). But in answer to your question, yes, I am a designer at an agency here in Madison, WI. Not sure if I will be staying here or moving back closer to fam. on west coast, or...??? What about you?

At 10:30am on October 14, 2012, kshy said…

Littleblue - thank you for sharing your wonderful photos, the love you had for each other can be seen. And the photo of you and your husband in the really brings tears to my eyes. I have photos of my husband in the hospital, even when he was in hospice, but I am not sure I can post them because it's so painful to see the change he went through. But in your photo, I also see the love. Thank you so much for sharing. 

At 6:16pm on October 13, 2012, Joyce said…

Welcome littleblue: I'm sorry for your loss but I'm glad you found your way to this site. I hope you will find the same comfort and understanding here at Widowed Village that I have. In the beginning I just read the blogs and posts and lurked in chat. Post and join us in chat when you feel comfortable. It is nice to be among people who "Get It".

At 6:56am on October 11, 2012, suebru (Sue) said…

LB, So sorry for your loss but happy you found this site where you will find loads of love, support and understanding. Hugs, Sue :-)

At 6:52am on October 11, 2012, Dianne in Nevada said…

Your photos are beautiful. Your love very evident. I'm so sorry you had so little time together, but it looks like you packed a lot of joy and love in those 5 years. 

Good that you've found WV so soon ... there is much love and support here.  Here's a good place to start: Basic Site Info

Join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place.  Those 'chirps' you hear when you're in Widowed Village mean people are talking in the Chat Room; stop in some time and join the conversations.  I look forward to getting to know you here.

At 3:57am on October 11, 2012, hendrixx2 said…

Welcome LB,

Sad that you had to join the club no one wants to be a part of, but glad you found this site, there is much support here...wishing you Peace and Healing...


At 6:51pm on October 10, 2012, wannabmartha said…

So sorry for the reason that you’re here but glad you’ve joined us. You’ll find insight, understanding and support here at Widowed Village. We’re traveling the same road together some further down the road than others.  Join a group when you’re ready to get better connected. Participate in a forum and/or chat anytime. If you have questions, feel free to ask. There is always someone around willing to help.


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