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I have watched the first 5 episodes and I have mixed feelings on the show.

The first episode shows him trying to return to work after just a month and his boss forcing him to go to grief counseling.  This bothered me, only because I felt like I was forced into talking to someone to make everyone around me happy.  In the end, only 2 sessions, I stopped going because it wasn't helping me.  I wasn't ready to discuss my feelings with a stranger just yet.  It's something that needs to happen with the person is ready and not because they're being forced into it.

I wasn't to thrilled to see that his support group was a mix of people dealing with all sorts of things.  There's a blind guy, a crazy cat lady who's cat died.  A lesbian that lost her partner.  A kid who is dealing with his brother being in a coma after an accident.  And well, a crazy person.

All different types of loss, but, other than the woman that lost her partner, none compare to what a widow/er is going through.  Yes to that person its a life changing issue, and none that should be taken lightly.  But I've had my loss of Patrick compared to the loss of a cat/dog/bird/pet.  While I feel sorry for the person because I have lost a few pets in my life, its just not the same.  I've lost my dad, my grandparents, aunt, uncle, best friend.  All of them hurt me in their own way, but nothing compared to losing Patrick.

But its hard not to compare.  It might be annoying at the time, but its human nature to try to compare who is the worst off.  I have 2 kids while someone else only has 1.  My husband was supposed to get better while they knew theirs was dying.  I try not to compare because no matter what happened leading up to the moment they passed, it all had the same outcome.  Part of us was ripped away.  We are now left with a hole the size of Texas in our hearts and trying to figure out to pick up the pieces.

The first show touches on the comparison.  They have "March Sadness" where they pair off and have 5 seconds to give their story.  Then the winner moves on to the next round.  5 seconds isn't anything when you're trying to put into words that your other half is gone.  The woman who lost her partner is beat out by the woman who lost her cat because she couldn't put it into words in under 5 seconds.

As much as this sucked to see, because the woman who lost her partner should have won, its realistic. 

They were right on the money on some things.  Little things that unless you've been there, you don't stop to think about.  Like Ann at her partner's grave.  She starts out calm and brought flowers, but it ends in her being so angry she starts to hit the headstone with the flowers.  Or the crazy cat woman watching TV but she's petting the cat tree and flicking the cat toy back and forth.  Or Paul, the widower, trying to sleep in his bed, but not being able to so he grabs a blanket and sleeps in a chair.

One thing that really hit home was him admitting the different things that made him cry.  Weird things make me cry.  Things that most people wouldn't understand.  A football game on TV.  A smell.  Being able to use salt.  Not mention all the normal everyday activities.  You have no idea how many times I've cried while shopping.  Some of the normal everyday things are now the hardest for me to do.  I was glad to see the show included that because "normal" people really have no clue.

The show has a lot of good qualities, and shows some things that I think "normal" people may  not understand, but I hope will open their eyes a little more to what we go through on a daily basis.

The humor part of it comes into my mixed feelings on it.  It could be because its only been 6 months since Patrick died, but it was hard for me to see the humor in some things.  I understood it, it was just hard for me to laugh at it.  Maybe it will become funnier to me the longer its been.  I don't know.  I just didn't see the humor the way it was intended.

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Comment by Soaring Spirits on October 4, 2012 at 5:36pm

Thanks for weighing in, and for your courage to watch something potentially difficult! You're certainly not the only one to have a hard time seeing the humor and I think it's great you shared your perspective.

I just posted the "master post" so you can see the links to what the others have written so far.



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