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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I hope you all enjoyed today. I was afraid today was going to be a tough day but instead it turned out to be a great day. Spent it with my brother and his family.

I think today is a tiny glimmer of hope that I am on my way to being ok. Of course I still have a few more hurdles ahead-Felix's birthday is on Monday. Christmas. My birthday, which is also New Year's Eve...but I hope to keep this positive thinking and feelings to help me through those days.

Late last night, I was thinking back to very intimate moments with Felix and I realized that that's it...all I have are memories of those beautiful, private moments. We can never be together again. I will never feel those hands, lips and skin again. It hit me SO SO hard and cried myself to sleep. But I guess that was also a moment of clarity. He is gone and there is nothing I can do about it. Just cherish the amazing love he gave me unconditionally.

I am so thankful for our Six years together. I learned so much from him. We saved each other from ourselves. We made each other better human beings. He learned to love himself. I learned to love OTHER than just myself. He died knowing he was loved and knowing his love made me strong. And I will live on with his love forever in my heart.

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Comment by mrossman on November 28, 2011 at 5:28pm

beautiful.  thanks for sharing and reminding all of us of the love we had shared in our own lives.  I think it is so beautiful that he dies knowing he was loved and his love made you strong.

Comment by CrazyWidow on November 28, 2011 at 7:27am

I'm glad that you were able to find clarity after that storm *hugs*

Comment by Dianne in Nevada on November 25, 2011 at 10:08am

A lovely post, Ariana ... and I'm so pleased to hear that you are seeing that "glimmer of hope".

Comment by Soaring Spirits on November 25, 2011 at 6:23am
How lucky you are to appreciate that you were both so loved... Glad today was good for you!

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