This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I'm such a visual person, I began thinking about what it looks like to continue to grow as a person through grief while posting to "There's a Hole" ---my thoughts wandered to the trees I've seen high up in the mountains standing tall and strong all the while rooted in rock.  I visualized what the little seed must have gone through while it continued to thrive.  I choose to believe those types of illustrations are God's way of showing us we can both survive and thrive under duress. When I made the choice to survive my grief I also made the choice to thrive despite it.  If this little poppy can be so pretty growing from concrete why can't life be beautiful through the hardships?  

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Comment by AandC on September 22, 2020 at 3:03am

This was exactly what I needed this morning as I was struggling with my grief from losing my husband a year ago in July. I am trying to thrive once again in life only to be hit by the waves here and there. I found a wonderful man who understood my pain, but was scared to commit. He was supportive and caring. So, now he is gone, and the hole is back, the grief is back to the physical and emotional pain of a knife to the heart and soul. I wonder if I was trying to find someone to fill the hole or was he really helping me to heal because I was happy and smiling more. 

This poppy shows strength beyond what is almost impossible. I was really feeling so discouraged and down. Thank you for the inspiration :)

Comment by howard J on August 3, 2020 at 9:12am

hello Rainy   I like what you said in your blog .   yes it is hard, harder for some than others. BUT .... we should not remain

stuck in our grief we must move on and love is giving.....with Gods help we can do that. but we must open our selves to it. 

Comment by Don on June 28, 2020 at 7:03am

I always told you that you got this

Comment by ScarletPlumes on June 14, 2020 at 12:41pm

This is such a beautiful example of beauty in hardship. It reminded me of what someone once told me. Without an immense amount of pressure, a diamond will remain just a rock. Hopefully something good is going to come out of all of this pain. 

Comment by Rainy on June 12, 2020 at 8:13am

Yes, that's perfect Estragon.   2 yrs ago I wouldn't have thought I'd have even made it to the mindset I'm at now.  Growing through this season of grief has made me a very different person.  I'd like to think I changed for the better because of it. 

Comment by Estragon on June 9, 2020 at 10:39am

Extending the thought of what the trees went through... some species actually require disaster to become what they are.  For example, some pines need otherwise devastating wildfire for seeds to grow (see Serotiny on Wikipedia) and contribute to the regrowth of the forest.  So it is with us, enduring the searing pain of loss will (I hope) prompt eventually regrowth into a new, healthy self.

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