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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

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Hi this is my first visit, not even sure if this is the correct page to do this on. I have had a lot of loss in a few short years. My sister, father in law,2 aunts and a close friend passed from cancer, then my amazing husband had a major heart attack, then my Mum and. now I'm dealing with my demanding ailing father. All the deaths happened in a four year period. My husband passed in December 2010 so I'm six years into this battle. I feel, and get told I need to move on but can't. That's it in a nutshell for now
Thanks
Pauline

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Comment by AEDforever (Ali) on May 16, 2017 at 5:23pm

Hi Pauline,  First I want to say I'm so sorry for your many Losses.  Next, I want to say, people who tell you to "move on" are pretty much full of shit.  Most of them have not experienced a single loss, let alone multiple losses. My brother died in 2009, my husband in 2012, my mother in 2013, a good friend in 2014.  Grief is grief.  And it isn't something you can "move on" from.  Wish it were that simple.  But it takes time, and tears, and reflection, and little by little, getting a new perspective, and building a new life.  Here, we don't ever say "Move On" we say "Move through" or "Move Forward"...because "Move On" implies you leave those you lost behind...and we can never really do that.

Comment by hyliek on May 12, 2017 at 3:22am

Hi Pauline, I am from South Africa so the time lines are a bit different.  I know how you feel.  I had one daughter die in 1986.  Then a break.  Then a daughter die in 2009, my husband in 2010, my gran in 2011.  I got remarried in 2012 and my husband died in 2016.  I married his friend end of 2016 and he dies on 25 April 2017.  Seems neverending.

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