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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Nobody but someone in this situation would understand what I'm about to share. 

I feel crazy, but grief is crazy sometimes. My husband has been dead for almost five months, but I need to call him. I have something important to tell him.

It's related to something in the news that we talked about and followed, and I know he'd really want to hear this latest development. It isn't mainstream enough that anyone else would care; it's just a quirky little thing we shared between us.

Knowing that I cannot call him then makes me realize again that we will never have those hours-long talks about everything. 

Gilbert was an attorney, tennis player, jazz trumpeter, bike rider, fountain pen collector, and voracious reader. He also had a photographic memory, so he could remember the date of everything. He had a wicked sense of humor.

I've wanted to call him so many times in the last five months with pen questions or tennis questions or important news.

I would give anything for just one phone call.

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Comment by Lifeunknown17 on August 8, 2018 at 6:09pm

all these "blogs" whatever that is. are just great stories.  most of which just make me cry.  but this one...how awesome is that. a phone booth to call someone who's died. My wife and i texted each other all the time, letting the other know we made it to work or where ever it was.  or just a HI, in the middle of a long day.  I've stopped doing it now, but through the 1st month and 1/2 i was still texting every morning.  then later, reading them on her phone, and texting back.   I do miss her so.  and for sure...i'll gladly take 1 more phone call.  

Comment by Melissa on April 5, 2018 at 10:53am

Oh,hamm4d! I'm so terribly sorry about Joe. I'm glad, though, that you found Widowed Village. This place has been a life saver for me. Please join groups and check in, especially when it feels especially lonely. You will find comfort here. My best to you.

Comment by hamm4d on April 4, 2018 at 6:43pm

It's only been a couple weeks since I lost Joe, and I find myself dozens of times a day picking my phone up to text him about something random, something funny, something silly, or nothing in particular. I miss just sharing mundane every day life with him. 

Comment by judy on April 1, 2018 at 3:06pm

I kept thinking when I was a camp in Tampa that something was missing.  But I couldn't wrap my head around it.  And now that you said about the 

telephone booth, that was it.  I was in there a few times last year.  Very healing.

Comment by Melissa on March 31, 2018 at 5:36pm

Thank you, Dianne. I'm crying just thinking about it. I will call him.

Comment by Dianne in Nevada on March 31, 2018 at 1:48pm

We set up on of those phones at our 2017 Tampa Camp Widow and it was amazing. You could go in and dial your loved one's number and have a conversation. It was so meaningful that I thought about setting something up in my backyard, but that's one of those things still on my to-do list that I haven't yet accomplished. Perhaps you bringing it up now will get me going on it. 

Regardless, I would highly recommend making that call ... with whatever phone you have at your disposal or just sit somewhere nice and have that conversation with your love. I can't tell you how wonderful it was for me. Thanks for the reminder.

Comment by Melissa on March 31, 2018 at 11:51am

LauraR, thank you for sharing that. I love that idea too!

Comment by LauraR on March 31, 2018 at 9:39am

So true.  I heard about a place in Japan (not sure where... someplace that experienced many dying in tsunami or earthquake or something) where someone placed an old, nonworking, phone booth in their yard for people to make calls to the dead. I love that idea! If I were closer I would visit for sure.

Comment by Melissa on March 29, 2018 at 11:48pm

Hugs, Barb2017. Thank you.

Comment by Barb2017 on March 29, 2018 at 8:50pm

Ed and I were best friends who fell in love right after high school and for almost 40 years we never missed a day without talking to each other. I so get this. Ed had some interests that werent necessarily mine, he was a WWII history buff for instance, and I find I am watching those programs on Netflix and Amazon just to feel close to him. I still have a few messages saved on my phone and play them every day. He passed away suddenly right after Thanksgiving and it sucks so much not being able to talk to him! So yeah, one phone call would be golden right now. *hugs*

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