This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I am a single parent with a 22-y/o special needs son, Ryan, who keeps me pretty busy. I started my own transcription business back in 2005 and was self-employed for 10 years--hours/commute were great but no benefits kinda sucked.  We moved from Naperville, Illinois to Spring Hill, Florida, in June 2007 and, aside from the extremely HOT days of the summer months, have enjoyed living here for the past 10 years. I have recently found new employment which I love which comes with great benefits! 
Things were going well until I got the rug pulled out from under me and my whole world shattered into a million pieces. 
My boyfriend of 15-1/2 years passed away unexpectedly on 6/11/14. He was not only my partner, but my best friend, lover and soul mate. He was the one person in this world I wanted to see and hear and talk to all the time. Even when we weren't physically together, we talked on the phone every single day. The fact that I just can't pick up the phone and call him is killing me right now. We lived together on and off for the first 8 yrs of our relationship when we both lived in Illinois. Then, due to loss of jobs for both of us, I moved with my son to Florida to live with my mom while he moved back home to live with his parents. The plan was always for us to get jobs, save money, and eventually have him come down to Florida to live with me. He finally came down to start our life together in July 2013--July 3, 2013, to be precise--and we lived together for almost a year. Had I known that he would be gone less than a year later, well, so many things I wish I would've done better. In early 2014, he went back to Illinois to spend time with his dad who had a lot of medical problems and he was worried about him. Unfortunately, I never saw him again after that. He passed away while home in Lombard, Illinois. I feel guilty that we were apart for the last 4 months. We were supposed to meet for a mini-vacation in Washington, D.C. for the 4th of July for a reunion in a place neither of us have ever been. Instead, exactly 3 weeks prior to us leaving, he had a fatal seizure in his sleep and passed away. 
I don't know what I'm going to do without him in my life. He was the one and only man in my life to ever truly love me for me and accept me for who I am who. I don't know what to do with myself without him in my life. It took me 25 years to find someone who didn’t care about my weight, we were together 15-1/2 years. I don’t see how I’m ever going find that again. 
But as I have learned, and I'm hoping that you all reading this will come to see, too, is that God has a plan for each of us.  I started going to church again and deepening my relationship with God. I found The Joy FM which has really been a blessing to me. I also decided to go back to school and have just finished my Associate of Science Health Information Technician degree. 
I hope whoever is reading this blog finds some comfort in knowing that God is with you and never lets go. So, if you feel yourself slipping down a wrong path, stop holding on and just let go and fall into His arms knowing that he will always be there to catch you and pick you up. 
If you have a question or comment, feel free to drop me a line! Have a Blessed Day!

Views: 53


You need to be a member of Widowed Village to add comments!

Join Widowed Village

© 2018   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service