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My Mom died yesterday....what about her dog?

My Husband died 4/4/12 and yesterday my Mother died. I have a hard time staying in my house without my Husband.  I'm not ready to move/sell anything yet. Now my Mother died and I'm feeling that I should take her 12 yr old heart broken dog but then I can't really leave my house for long. I'm really numb and not capable yet of making a good decision on this. I have a week or so. My Mom's friends are watching the dog and I check on him twice a day at Mom's house.

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Comment by grace28 on October 1, 2012 at 6:14pm

Well, I haven't really mourned my Mom either. My Husband died ater a wonderful 25 yr marriage. My Mom was a difficult person. Anyway, my Husband always had my back and then he was gone, Mom was on attack and then she was gone! Anyway, I did right with all her things, her house, her dog but I haven't taken all her friends to lunch as I promised and I plan to do that in a week. Her services and burial were wonderful . Losing an older parent doesn't compare to losing the person you spent every day with! I am reeling but Hubby's BD is tommorrow .

Comment by Jerry on October 1, 2012 at 3:27pm
My Mom was diagnosed with lung cancer one month after my wife passed away. She chose not to have any treatments because of what she saw my wife go through. She lived for one year and passed way on her 88th birthday.she died at home, no real pain, unless she hid it from us. That was her wish, to die at home, not in a hospital. The thing that bothered me is that even though I was very close with my mom, it never seemed to hit me hard when she died.i asked a therapist about this, he told me it was due to me losing my wife, and my mind couldn't handle another bout of grief.as far as your moms dog, I would give it a try, the dog may be good company. I have 2 dogs, my wife at times would say they held us back from doing hints,they sure do for me now. When my ire was here we could at least do things by ourselves, as one of us would be home to take care of them. But although they are a pain at times,they do get me out to walk them on days that I am down and would rather just stay in.
Comment by grace28 on September 19, 2012 at 5:53pm

Hi! My Mom was a heavy smoker, 82 yrs old, who had signs that things weren't going well. Ankle/leg swelling, shortness of breath , mostly the last 6 mos. She chose to ignore every Dr. She went to the hospital and died in 36 hours. She never really felt any pain. In fact when your lungs fill with water, You become filled with carbon dioxide (that's what this Dr. told me) and she was actually euphoric-  I love you grace,I love Jr, My dog,etc...and in a short time she was gone. No treatments, tests, not alot of tubes, etc. Really, the way she wanted to go. In fact at one point, she woke up and asked me if I thought Alec Baldwin was good looking! Late night TV was on. I wouldn't mind going like that. I don't think I really have grieved her yet, still trying to come to some kind of terms with my Husband's death... Oh well.

Comment by KMl on September 14, 2012 at 6:47pm
OMG. I am so sorry. Had your mom been ill? Life is tough! Have you considered a grief support group? I am in a local one called Grief Share. Let me know if yoU would like the link.
KML
Comment by kimkirt (KK) on May 15, 2012 at 11:03am

I'm glad you are taking a little time to make the decision. I'm sure whichever one you make will be the best for you, and that is who you have to consider right now, yourself. HUGS>

Comment by rodsgurl09 on May 14, 2012 at 8:29am

Grace, goodness, my heart goes out to you. I would say if the dog brings you comfort, try to keep him. If he is going to cause more stress, find another option. You have been through too much to handle any more. Take care of yourself first and foremost. (((hugs)))

Comment by shattered 1(Karen) on May 14, 2012 at 8:06am

Grace, will you IM me your location and the breed of the dog?  If you like I will try to find rescue groups in your area who may help out if you cannot keep the dog.  I will do the searching for you if you like, as I work with dogs and know that there are people all over the country who are willing to help out in certain cases.  Peace and hugs to you.  I am so sorry for what you are going through.

Comment by MsKris12 on May 14, 2012 at 6:58am

((GRACE))!  Love, so sorry.....

 

No real advice for the dog issue...have to say after my husband died (2-2-11) his dog, Walker, went into a real funk and I am now just seeing him come out of it.  I worried about him almost as much as my kids.  He is 13, it is a tough decision, is there someone in your circle who perhaps can spend the time necessary with the dog, who in turn could use the companionship a dog has to offer???

 

In the end do what is best for you

Blessings

Kris

Comment by celestia (Suzanne) on May 13, 2012 at 8:22pm

I'm so sorry for you. Life can be brutally unfair at times. I hope you have support, and I hope you know we are here to listen. Take good care of you.

Comment by Ace on May 13, 2012 at 7:04pm

((((grace28))))) I lost my mom on Mother's Day also....15 years ago. By the end of the week perhaps you will know better what to do regarding her dog.

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