Hi everyone, it is awhile since I posted. I have just gotten through the 1st anniversary of my husbands death. It was a very sad day but not as bad as I thought it would be. I went out with a friend who had lost her husband 18months before I lost mine. We went to a movie and then went to his favourite Thai restaurant for lunch, i had a glass of wine to toast him as he loved a glass of wine. My family and friends all posted lovely messages on facebook and my beautiful granddaughter sent me a replica of the flowers we had on his casket. It was a lovely thought from her. I am getting over t he terrible longing for him that I had in the beginning but it is still there and I don’t think it will ever go away completely.. life is so different now from what it was when he was here. The days when I am home all day on my own are the worst. Sometimes I look at his picture ad smile or cry or both. Even though I don’t cry all day as I used to, the pain in my heart is still there and sometimes I think it will burst. I wrote a poem for him t hat I would like to share with you.
THE BEAUTIFUL SONG HAS ENDED THE LIGHT HAS GONE OUT OF MY LIFE
EACH DAY IS STILL A STRUGGLE TO GET THROUGH THE PAIN AND STRIFE
MYMIND SAYS THERE ARE BETTER DAYS MY HEART CRIES NO THERES NOT
HOW WILL I LIVE THE REST OFMY DAYS KNOWING WHAT I HAVE LOST
YOU’D SAY PLEASE DARLING DO NOT CRY I DON’T WANT YOU TO BE SAD
I JUST WANT YOU TO REMEMBER THE WONDERFUL LOVE WE HAD
AND I DO ALWAYS REMEMBER EVERY SINGLE DAY THAT IS WHY THIS PAIN IN MY HEART WILL NOT GO AWAY
SO MANY MORE YEARS I WANTED WITH YOU TO GROW VERY OLD BY YOUR SIDE
TO HOLD YOU CLOSE AND KISS YOUR FACE A NEVER ENDING RIDE
BUT NOW I HAVE THIS NEW LIFE THAT I HAVE TO GET THROUGH
KNOWING THAT IT NEVER WILL BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU
SOME DAYS I SMILE AND GET THROUGH THE DAY SOME DAYS I’M VERY BLUE
BUT I MUST ALWAYS REMEMBER I WAS VERY LUCKY TO HAVE YOU.
I hope some of you at least are able to have some good days as we all go through this journey that none of us wanted to take.
Thoughts to you all.