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Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

second year of the bunny without her bear

It has been two years now.   To help me see how much i have accomplished I decided to make a list of my accomplishments

I no longer cry when I say i am a widow- still can't say single

I longer cry myself to sleep- sleeping is getting better

I got rid of all his clothes and shoes- still have a jacket and a sweatshirt we used to share

The bathroom no longer has anything of his- I just need to paint it and maybe put my stuff in their you know like makeup and hair stuff.

The car we shared i still have. But it is now bare to the bone.-  except for the rosary my father gave me many years ago. shortly after my                                                                                                    dads passing i hung it on the rear view mirror and have left it there since.

I replaced the stove and the fridge something we needed to do for a long time but couldn't get him to agree on.

I was finally able to change the curtains in the living room 

I took off the divider that he hated so much. he was right the dining area is larger without it

I finally got someone to clean up the yard cut the branches and put edging around the trees

I no longer cry at shows we used to see together and still trying to see them without changing the channel- but i am not crying anymore

I have discovered new shows that i like to watch and new movies

I have gone back to work that was the hardest- he used to see me off to work every single time.

I am more familiar with what repairs the car needs when it needs them and where to go 

I am better at managing my expenses now--. no more buying 50 dollar makeup

I now eat more salads, exercise and watch my weight (had gained but now lost ten pounds)

I still have a long way to go but i will get there ( home repairs, social activities, business)

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Comment by b2 on September 1, 2018 at 6:58am

thank you for reading my blog diva 70 . It has been two years for me. your reply to the fact that you cant say single either brought me such comfort because it helped me to feel normal. Thank you soo much.   ;-)

Comment by DIVA70 on August 31, 2018 at 10:04pm

Thank you for has only been four months since the love my life left. People have moved on with their lives and I understand that. But my life froze on April 29th and it has yet to unthaw. I still cant bring myself to get rid of his clothes. I did give our youngest son a few of his shirts but otherwise everything is in his closet just as it was before he left. His favorite pajamas are still in his basket in the bathroom. His toothbrush is still in its same place. A friend told me I should redecorate and make the house mine now. I just laughed and told her its always been mine. All the colors and furnishings we picked out together so why replace what we both loved. I did have the landscaping changed and updated but that's a project we had always talked about doing. Our daughter brought me a new Casper mattress and foundation but that too was something we had already planned to replace. I don't share too much with people because I can tell they just don't get it. A few of my friends and relatives have never married so they don't understand what all the fuss is about being alone. I cant say single either. Widow is the accurate description of my current status and I have no desire to change it. I too am performing tasks I never had to think about before. I have taken the car in for repairs and I had to have the sewage pump replaced today. LOL...I didn't even know where the darn thing was located until the plumber pointed it out to me. I still watch the old programs we use to enjoy together. (Laramie and Gunsmoke were our favorites) But I still find myself crying at the oddest times. I guess I need more time. The bottom line is I enjoyed being married to this one man for over 47 years. I'm trying to get up the courage to travel alone. I tried to return to the health club we used to go to together but I think I went too soon. It was too depressing for me. Hopefully, I'll try again soon. I come to this site because of people like you. I read your comments and I know you know what I'm dealing with and will not be dismissive. With time we will get to a more happy place.  

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