A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
THIS House
My landlady wrote me the other day and said she would like to sell it to me, was I interested? Heck yeah I'm interested but I also know I could probably never come up with the financing, short of a miracle. Our credit is toast and I have little to no down payment, even though I make great money. I don't take her question seriously though because she's a little flaky.
How in the world will I ever leave it? I know I need to prepare myself for the possibility. My lease is up in August, or July, I don't want to look it up. It would be like ripping off the band-aid all over again, especially if it's anywhere near the date of the first anniversary of his death. That would kill me. How much more?
I know. I'm borrowing heartache. It's just a building after all. Right? Maybe the best thing for me to start healing would BE to leave this house. I don't know. I need to think this through, but it's hard to think when it's still so raw.
Now who's flaky?
Comment
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Comment by MyNewLife on February 4, 2013 at 1:00pm -
My sister made a good point. She said, "You know he's not there, but if you feel like leaving that house will be leaving a part of him behind, remember that you sleep in the bed where he died. I would think that was much more intimate than any old building." Well duh! I hadn't thought of that, so now if I have to give up this house, I don't have to give up our bed. That makes me feel much better about the hard decisions I have made and have to follow through with when the time comes.
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Comment by MrsD on January 28, 2013 at 11:17am -
I'm sorry. I have a conflict too. I'm underwater on the mortgage on our condo. And I would like to stay, just because it was our last home together. But staying in a condo means I can't keep my dogs with me. And they were a huige part of our old life. I would like a little house, but that would be so bittersweet without him. All I wanted was for us to have a house so our kids and dogs could play in the yard. If I could sell my place and find a cheap little house though, that might be more affordable that where I'm at now. And I do have to think about the financial side, if only for my daughter's sake.
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Comment by Joyce on January 27, 2013 at 10:04am -
MyNewLife, Janet is right, you will know when the time is right. Take a day at a time, baby steps. Hugs!
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Comment by janet on January 26, 2013 at 3:51pm -
MyNewLife you will know what to do with the time is right. Wishing you Peace and Hope on this journey.
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