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Time does NOT fly:(
I'm feeling such anxiety today. Today I go to court to have our Chapter 13 Bankruptcy switched to a Chapter 7 which basically washes away all debt. We filed last year for 13 because his business as a Licensed General Contractor dried up over the past 3-4 yrs. and we needed to save the house. He took care of all of that. As much as we tried not to have to do that we had no choice. Over the past year he got a great job and we were on our way back to financial stability. Then he died. I had to handle all of this latest ordeal. I have to go by myself to court today to see a judge and hopefully he'll authorize this. This will wash away all his medical bills. I'm on the verge of tears as it is but this is just sending me over the edge. Such a big thing for me to go through by myself. Heavy pressure on my chest. Hard to breathe. Just thinking about the way my life turned out is mind boggling to me. I sure didn't see this coming. This big house. All by myself. These 3 big Boxer babies, all by myself. Tomorrow will be 11 weeks out for me but it seems like a lifetime since he's been gone. I've done so much, been through so much, felt so much, time just seems to drag and drag. Normally if he was here 11 weeks would fly by in the wink of an eye. Oh I get it, that's where that saying comes from "Time flies when you're having fun" Well I sure as hell am not having fun so that must be why time is dragging;/
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Comment by honeys(puddin) on July 26, 2012 at 8:26pm
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Patjbam I know you are right about asking for help. Really there's nothing that anyone can do about a lot of things I'm going through. There's a few things that I have needed and have asked for help. My goal is to keep this house. It was our home. The kids grew up here. The grandkids know it as Grandma and Grandpas. I need to stop spending the way I am and start focusing on saving. It's been a stress relief but reality is now setting in that this is it. It is all dependent on me now. Feels like a heavy load for these shoulders;/
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Comment by Patjbam on July 26, 2012 at 5:18pm -
Eleven weeks isn't very long. Time gets a little strange during grief, I've discovered. I think we go into a state of shock. I had a lot of crap to clean up after my husband died. I sold the house we lived in. I still have a property to sell because I (we couldn't) can't afford it. It's been on the market since April 2011. When I look back I am amazed that I was able to clean out our house and sell it. I do not like asking for help but I realized it was the only way I was going to get through everything. I know that if I was asked to help someone I wouldn't hesitate, but it was very difficult for me. However, I changed my perspective when I read something. When I ask for help I am giving someone an opportunity to share a kindness. And it feels good. So, ask for help. And, you have a group of people on this site who are supporting you because we know what you're going through. hugs...
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Case had to be rescheduled because I have contacted an attorney about a possible malpractice suit. Malpractice lawyer hasn't even said she'd take it yet-they're still in the investigative part of it. Bankruptcy judge wants my lawyer to contact malpractice lawyer to see if they're proceeding with the suit. If they are then any money they win would cover Honeys medical bills. If they're not taking the case then my bankruptcy will go on. I don't even care about the malpratice money if there is any because all I want is for someone to tell me that everything was done right in my Honeys medical care. Please don't let it be because someone screwed up. Please don't let it be that:( After court the truck I am borrowing because my truck is in the shop, wouldn't start. Had to call my sister (it's her truck) who then called her boyfriend who came and figured it out and got me on my way. I have cried entirely too much today. I feel wiped out and I still have several more hours with these daycare kids of mine. I feel a drinking night coming on;/
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Comment by telechick on July 26, 2012 at 12:24pm
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I can sympathize. I am trying to close down my husband's business which involves writing several 300 pg reports while working full time at my real job. The client is not happy with me withdrawing from the contract and it's getting pretty stressful - along with fighting with the insurance, trying to sell 2 houses and missing C dreadfully. It all just sucks.
Good luck with court. I hope it goes the way you need it to. Hugs!
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Comment by bj628(Bonnie) on July 26, 2012 at 11:11am -
Hi Honey, I was also left with a financial mess.. I closed his business May 1st. Have been going back and forth about bankruptcy... I wish you had someone to go with you to court... so many things, so much paper work.
Sending warm thoughts.. We are survivors ....
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On top of it all I came across an email message that we did back in Feb. it was about his high triglycerides and the things that we needed to do as far as eating went. We went back and forth in humor and at one point I told him I didn't want do die because I didn't try and I DAMN sure didn't want HIM to die for lack of trying because he was NOT going to leave me with all the CRAP. The conversation continued humorously and that was that. Talk about eating my words:( I can't stop crying and I have to leave for court in a minute. Great;/
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Comment by suebru (Sue) on July 26, 2012 at 9:18am -
Honeyspiddin, Be kind to yourself. You have been through so much very much the past 11 weeks. Please know you are NOT alone. My thought and prayers are with you on this very difficult day. Please post later as to how things went today. Big (BIG) hugs.
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