When a firefighter is forced to jump from a burning building, his family’s lives are changed forever.

When Eileen Bellew’s FDNY husband, John, was forced to jump from a fourth-story window, on the infamous Black Sunday in the Bronx, Eileen became a widow at 35-years-old with four small children to raise on her own. PTSD, anxiety, and panic attacks ambushed her as she struggled through bottomless grief and the ensuing legal trials, all while trying not to let her fear do irreparable damage to her four little loves.

Eileen’s insightful, shocking, and often humorous story spans twenty years of enlightenment as she navigates her emotional roller coaster life through heartache, healing, and the surprise of finding love again. Her frank account of how she gained resilience and strength brings hope through the lessons she learned and shows how we can find positivity even in the worst tragedy.